What Happened To Make Believe?

It's raining here in Virginia today. Cold. Wet. Miserable rain! The girls woke up early this morning and I heard the click of the Christmas lights being turned on. Kacey tested at a 167...I'm thinking theres a Lantus change coming this week. She's doing great with the 1:15 ratio though! We had breakfast and then put on some Christmas music. Kacey then convinced Kayleigh to play dolls with her. I sat here watching my 14 year old and my 8 year old playing with the Playschool Family Dollhouse. They set up all the rooms and I listened to them "make believe" and it got me thinking....

What happened to playing Make Believe?

I remember as a child saying stuff like "You pretend....." and "I'll pretend...." but I rarely hear that these days. It seems the kids now a days just don't play make believe like we did when we were little. Of course, I'm 33 years old now, but I can remember playing Barbies...making forts and playing house....and dress up like it was yesterday! I remember playing outside until it was dark and my Mom having to call us in to eat dinner. Hide & Seek....Red Rover...Freeze Tag....Hopscotch....all those games that kids these days don't play or they don't even know how to play!

So I listened to them closely play together...even as old as they are...they were pretending and actually getting along instead of picking at one another. It made my heart smile and I feel all warm and fuzzy just thinking about my childhood. It might be cold and wet outside....but it's warm in here :)

What are some of your best childhood "make believe" memories?

Test Strip Pics

Here are some of the pictures Kacey made with her test strips last night. I couldn't post them all so I chose a few of my personal favs! Enjoy :) ...and thanks Lynnea for the great idea for photo cards! I will definately put some more thought into that!!

Santa & his reindeer (This is my FAV!! Priceless!!)

Cure Diabetes Angel

Pretty self explanitory....I Love You

Christmas Tree

Flowers & Sunshine

Sunshine

Addicted...I'd say so!

OK...I so addicted to this Twilight series! I read the 2nd book in only a week and my Mom had bought me the 3rd book for Christmas. While we were out shopping today she got me the 4th and final book (does a secret happy dance) and when we got back home from shopping she gave me the 3rd book and kept the 4th for Christmas...YAYYYYY! So now I get to start the 3rd book tonight and I am so excited!

I don't know what it is about Edward.... *sigh* .... maybe the fact that I know he's played by a British actor and I have a very weak spot for those sexy Brits *wink* LOL! Then again, it could be the fact that he's resists that urge to bite Bella and it makes you wanna read more!

Whatever the reason... I'm addicted and can't wait to get more of Edward!

It's beginning to look alot like Christmas...

On the day after Thanksgiving, while all the crazies are out pushing, shoving and fighting over useless bargains, I stay home and drag down the Christmas decorations. I got up at 7am...tiptoed to the kitchen and put on some coffee...and then put on Classic Christmas songs CD. Kayleigh spent the night with my Mom and they got up at 4am and were out fighting those crazies. Kacey woke up at 8am...sugar was a 161 and she was smiling...Id already cleaned up the living room and rearranged what needed to be so we could start the decorating. Once Kayleigh came home we decorated the tree.....After they finished decorating, Kacey decided to be creative again. Since she was diagnosed, she has this issue with saving used test strips. She has a little dish that she drops them in and when she gets enough of them she makes a picture with them. When she did the first one, I wasn't sure if it was something we should be doing. I mean, after all, they do have used blood on them and some people get all bent out of shape with the idea of that....BUT....this was Kaceys blood so I knew as long as we only kept them at our house then we were fine. Well...while I was talking with one of the teachers at school, the topic of these pictures came up. She asked me why Kacey makes them? Well...it's sorta like "therapy" for her. She has to do something painful but then she uses that and makes something creative with it. So I was telling her that Kacey wanted to share the pics with family but I had to explain to her that some people just dont like the idea of "blood" so she gave me a fantastic idea....laminate them! OMG! Thats great! Plus it keeps the strips from coming off and we can save them for years to come. I thought maybe we'd start a "Test Strip Scrapbook" and when she gets older, it will be something she can look back on. But...she gave away her first picture this morning.
She made this one for Nae-Nae (my Mom) and we laminated it and took it to her this morning. We aren't going to make it a habit of giving these pictures out but she wanted to make one for my Mom for Christmas. This pic was 29 pokes....thats 29 sugar tests...about 3 days worth! So when she gave it to my Mom she was so proud of herself and my Mom went on to make a dramatic excited reaction and told her she would display it :) Ahhhh...whatever it takes to get her thru a daily poke! BTW...I have 13 more pics to laminate...LOL! I'll post them soon!

Hope everyone is having a great weekend!

Thankful....

Happy Thanksgiving to everyone out there!

We are finally back home after all the visiting we did today :) I must say that I'm very pleased with the way our day went! Kacey woke up at a 133...wow prefect! She was smiling and ate breakfast and played for a bit. We went to visit at lunchtime and she tested for lunch and was a 222 and 3hrs after a good Thanksgiving meal...187! YES! I was thrilled...but I must give credit to that little thing called a Wii! She was playing the Wii with 2 other kids and she was actually sweating!! Ummm Im beginning to think I should rethink what I was getting her for Christmas! So now we're back home and she just tested because she's hungry again.... 122! YAYYYYYYY! Wow! Could I be anymore thankful? Nope! It was a fantastic day :)

I hope all of you had a nice Thanksgiving!

Oh! It's Feels So Good....

TO BE BACK IN RANGE!!!!!!

Yep...today Kacey was back in range all day today and she's feeling GREAT! It's so nice to look at her and see the smile on her face and know she really does feel "normal" (as normal as she can get) Today was a good day!

She had "Toga Day" at school since they are talking about Ancient Greece in class. She wore her "t-shirt toga" and they had some Olympic Games set up outside which she was able to run, jump and play without D getting in the way. After the games, she had PE today and she was still playing and feeling great! She did call me at lunchtime because they made Oreo cookie turkey's in class with one Oreo and some candy corns and she didn't want to eat it before she asked me (sad that she has to do that at 8yrs old!) So anyway...since she'd already had lunch and she'd already had a shot for lunch, I convinced her to put it in a baggie and bring it home for a snack later on and because Mommy wanted to SEE her artwork! (geesh I hated doing that!) But she was proud of it and wanted to show me so it all worked out :) She was fine with it and was in the best mood! Ahhh, almost like I had my "old" Kacey back! When I picked her up from school, her teacher Mrs. M was smiling and so was Kacey...I looked puzzled and she went on to tell me that Kacey got an A on the math test today.... an A which was very hard to make....and very few students got! HOLY COW! Yayyyyyy! I was doing the "Happy Mommy" dance!

I have ALOT to be Thankful for and I'll save that for tomorrow!

Aggressive Dose Change

I got a call from the CDE yesterday afternoon and she said they got the faxed blood sugars and they are going to make the aggressive dose change. The I:C ratio is now 1:15 at EVERY meal!! YAYYYY! Finally! I've been saying we needed this change for a while now :) OK...so dinner dose was the first we did it and she was a 156 before bed! She woke up at a 196 so if that continues then it wouldnt surprise me if they made the Lantus change next week. I'm just happy they made the aggressive change so she can come down out of those high 200's-300's. She was all smiles this morning so thats a good sign!

I'll update later on how the numbers went :)

1st Annual Secret Santa

Ohhhhh boy! Im really excited about getting in on the first Secret Santa on here :) If you haven't heard about it yet then check out the post over on Allison's blog.

Whoever draws my name can actually shop for Kacey if they choose to instead of me :)

Also thanks to Cara who taught me how to finally link...haha! I got it girlie!!

Faxed blood sugars yesterday and havent heard back from the doc yet. Last night for Kaceys dinner dose, when I totalled carbs and figured out her dose it was 3.33 and instead of rounding down to 3 units...I rounded up to 4 units...got her to a 126 for bedtime...YAYYYYYYYYY!!! When she woke up this morning... 171 :) Thats better than a 271!

I'll update as soon as I hear from the doc.

Til later....

Food Meme (thanks Cara!)

1. Can you cook? If yes, do you like to cook?
Yes I can cook! Been cooking since I can remember standing in a chair against the counter in the kitchen with my Mom. I like to cook when I feel like it...its something that I have to be in the mood to do.

2. When do you eat with your whole family?
Usually just on special holidays and birthdays

3. What do you eat for breakfast?
Ummmm does coffee count as a breakfast food? LOL! I am not usually one to eat breakfast.

4. When, where and how do you eat on weekdays?
LOL...very carefully! My schedule during the week depends on what my daughter's schedules are. During sports season its insane!

5. How often do you eat out (in a restaurant)?Does this include drive-thru?
Not very often! Things are so dang expensive!

6. How often do you order delivery/take-out?
Not often!

7. Regarding no. 5 and 6: Say there weren’t financial reasons would you do this more often?
Probably not...unless its pizza or chinese food

8. Are there any “standard dishes” you serve regularly?
Not really...it's just based on what everyone is hungry for... spaghetti, pizza, veggie stuff

9. Have you ever cooked for more than 6 persons?
Yep :)

10. Do you cook every day?An actual meal?
Well I cook alot more "meals" now that Kacey is eating a little bit different. Moreso at breakfast time because we're not doing the sugary cereals anymore that were a fast meal

11. Have you ever tried recipes from blogs?
Yep :D

12. Who cooks more frequently at your home?
Me, usually....but every now and then the girls will want different meals and then they make what they want.

13. And who cooks better?
I think we all do a good job! :D My oldest daughter makes the best spaghetti sauce tho!

14. Do you cook totally different compared to your mother/parents?
Very!

15. If yes, do you nevertheless eat at your parents?
I do...but my Mom makes sure she has stuff that the girls and I can eat

16. Are you a vegetarian or could you imagine being one?
Yep...for 7 years now! Both of my girls are too...which is why I cook different than my Mom used to...LOL!

17. What would you like to cook which you haven’t dared to make yet?
Idk...Im not scared of cooking anything! I love to try new recipes :)

18. Do you prefer cooking or baking?
Baking for sure!!!

19. What is your greatest misery in the kitchen?
I'd have to say the counter space! I wish I had a wider counter top or an island so I had the room to roll out dozens of cookies and stuff like that!

20. What do you dislike?
Meat! I dont want anything to do with meat dishes! I still cook it for Frankie but I hate the smell of it. I also hate washing dishes...I love to cook but the clean up sucks!!!

Lancet Changes?

How often do you change your lancet?

This question got the wheels in my head spinning! When we first came home from the hospital, 4 months ago, we were told in the hospital that you change the lancet every time you prick your finger...ok... so about a month went by and when Kacey was grabbing the kit and testing on her own, she'd just test and not change it. I'd jump all over her about changing it and she insisted that she didn't need to! So now as the months go on, she only changes her lancet out every few days and most of the time it's because I remind her to! So is that gross? Is that unsafe? Should we be changing it out every time she pricks her finger like the doctor told us to?

Adjustments

I finally got a call back from the CDE about the faxed blood sugars! She said she wasn't sure why I wasn't called but Dr. R didn't want to make any changes....WHAT?!?! Ummm so the "Supermom" part of me stood up and said "Well I really think a change needs to be made!" (keep in mind I already made the change at lunch and hadn't said anything because she was having sugars in the high 300's just 2hrs after eating) So she asked me what I thought needed a change and I told her if she looked at her chart then2 hrs after lunch she was bouncing into the 300's and I felt that was a sign that she needed a carb change! Her response... "Great job Mom!" Ahhhhh ~does a happy dance~ So she told me to change the carbs for lunch and then fax blood sugars in on Monday and if she was still staying high through the day then as long as she wasnt sick they were going to take "a more aggressive approach" ....FINALLY! Whew! She said they didn't want to change much because of her being sick. They werent sure how many of the highs were because of the cold and how many were from food so they just left it. Yesterday she spent all day in the 200's...my "Supermom" part of me says... Lantus change :D LOL...lets see what the doc thinks when I give them last weeks sugar numbers! Haha! Ya know, there is this part of me that really gets this! I mean I really do understand it now... I understand the dosing....I understand the carbs....I understand the slow changes...I understand DIABETES! Now I dont understand why she goes from a 60 to a 495 in 15min...LOL but I'll get there! I feel comfortable with tweaking her dose...Kacey is comfortable enough to test often (so we can watch the changes)... and Im actually proud of both of us! We've come a long way in 4 months and I think we're doing pretty darn good :)

All that being said....its 7:30am and time to go test her for the first time this morning!

Have a great Sunday!

Twilight

Over the last few weeks, I've listened to the hype grow larger and larger over the movie coming out. I've heard people talking about the book and how they were counting the days to the movie because the book was amazing. Soooooo....last night I bought the book! LOL! I love reading and normally I dont get time to but last night my oldest daughter was at a sleepover...Kacey was watching Wall-E with Frankie and it was 8pm and I actually had a chance to sit down! So I cracked the book open and at 11:30pm, I was STILL reading! I couldn't put it down!!! Today was a cold day...nothing to do really...and I picked the book back up at 1pm....and at 6pm... I FINISHED THE BOOK!! Omggggggggg! It was GREAT! I can't wait to get the next one in the series!! I must say...it was easy to read and definately sucked me into the whole storyline.

I really do look forward to seeing the movie now and how different it is from the book! :)

Miss Blogging

Wow...its amazing how much you actually miss blogging when you don't have the time to! I've been really busy the last week or so :) and my head is a whirlwind right now so its wayyyy past time to blog!

Let's see...

I finally got my application turned in...the transcripts were sent...and all the letters of reference are in :D So hopefully I will hear something soon! In the meantime, this is the first day that Ive not been at Kacey's school until after lunch. Kacey's school nurse will not be back until probably the middle of Dec now so they hired on a part time RN to help from Wed-Fri and the teacher thats been in there since Mrs. H left to be with her Mom will be in there Mon-Tues. OK... so this new RN... Ms. Heather... OMG we love her!!! She's very knowledgeable and I feel like Kacey is in really good hands with her (not that I didn't feel like that before) but it just makes me feel better knowing theres a RN on site now! She's very nice and personable and Kacey's really taken to her. I sat with her for a little while this morning going over past blood sugar numbers and she was trying to help me find trends.... yep she used the word trends too....kinda makes you smile inside when you talk to someone and they know what you're talking about and you don't have to explain what a trend is before you even start! She's familiar with "diabetes lingo" ...lol! As a matter a fact, she told me this morning when she worked as a neonatal nurse at Children's (the same hospital Kacey goes to) she said she worked with another nurse that was Type 1 and she was on a pump but she'd have the lowwwww lows... the kind where you get confused, etc....the kind that Kerri talks about having! But she said she could see when they were coming on and she'd get her juice or snacks...so you can imagine as a Mom ...hearing this made me feel VERY safe to leave the school today :) Now...dont get me wrong...we love Mrs. H and we're glad she takes good care of Kacey....but we really like Ms. Heather and we're thankful they found someone to cover as an RN! So here I am... finally back home....got 3 loads of laundry done...dishes washed....bathrooms cleaned....and now Im here catching up! Haha...a mother's job is never done!

Now...for Kaceys update....shes feeling much better :) still has that nasty cough but with the weather going from the 20's to the 50's and back again...its hard to NOT be sick! Thankfully the sinus crap is gone tho and her numbers are still bouncing like Tigger *grumbles* I faxed blood sugars on Monday and it is now Friday and I've not heard a single word from them! I've used that logbook from Kevin at www.parenthetic-diabetic.blogspot.com (which btw we absolutely love) and I've noticed that her sugars are jumping from the 140-160 range at lunch up to the mid 300's about 2hrs later .... sounds like a carb change huh? So I went on and made the I:C change from 1:20 to 1:18 like all the other meals and we'll see what happens :) She's still running in the 180-300 range on a good day...so not sure what other changes they will want to make but Im really getting comfortable with trying to tweak this on my own! Im still doing the middle of the night checks and the results seem to vary so I guess her body is still doing some wacky things...LOL! Other than that, she's doing good. She's seemed to adjust to the highs and she just rolls with it...not sure if thats a good thing or a bad thing....LOL she's had so many highs lately that shes just used to it and deals with it.

As for me...I had a few Mommy Meltdowns over the last week. I think it was more due to the emotional roller coaster my body was on because of PMS, lack of sleep and stress of dealing with it all because they were the uncontrollable crying urges and I seemed to get choked up by the littlest things...so yeah....I feel much more normal now that things have adjusted! It's amazing what stress will do to you!

I guess thats about all :) Hope everyone is doing well and I hope to be back in the blogging world regularly now!

~*~JILL~*~

Biggest Loser Bitch!

OMGGGGGGG Caraaaaaaaaa..... Can you believe what just happened on The Biggest Loser? Dangit! I thought for SURE Vicky was gone! OMG I cant believe Amy would keep her there after all that happened....that sucks!!! I guess she's playing the game now...LOL cuz if she keeps black in her corner and then has blue in her corner, she can weasel her way thru to the finale!

Geesh! I wanted her to leaveeeeeee!!!!

Fall Festival 11-15-08

Kacey taking a dive during the obstacle course

LOL she was like a rollie pollie...least she was smiling!

Kacey & Nae Nae (my Mom) doing the Cake Walk

Kacey, Kayleigh (her sis), Stephen (Kays boyfriend),

Samantha (Stephens sis) and Austin (Stephens brother)

Weekend Update

Whew! This was a fast weekend :(

I left off on Friday morning. Kacey woke up at a 163 and was feeling well enough to go back to school. She was really excited about going to the play....so much that by 9am she was up to a 286! I had a chance to speak to the teachers about the note. Geezus...lack of sleep combined with major PMS emotions had me all choked up and I ended up in tears trying to talk to Mrs. S about what happened. She assured me that it wasnt just Kacey that wasnt listening that day...it was the whole class...and she wasnt singled out...they all were spoken to. So after making an emotional blubbering ass of myself, I boarded the bus with Kacey to leave for the fieldtrip. The play was at Kayleigh's school and it turned out to be a production by Theater 4 and was "The Boy Who Cried Wolf". The kids loved it! While we were sitting there, it was time for Kacey to test and have a snack... 257! Grrrr... ok so that meant we had to do a correction shot. This really sucks! By lunchtime she was down to a 169...ok we're back in range....for now! So 3pm rolls around....time to test again.... 361!!! Holy cow!! Have I mentioned how frustrating this is....and again...lack of sleep and PMS has me in tears again! We come home and 5pm...shes a 251...so we do dinner and a correction. Since Kayleigh was gone out with Stephen and his family and Frankie went to meet a friend...it was just me and Kacey for the evening. We dug out the UNO game and played about 30 games :) It was good to see her laugh (even if she was running on the high side). So by 8pm it was time to test for bedtime.... imagine the shocking smile on her face when the beep revealed a 128! YAY! OK...so all the correcting all day long finally has her back on the low end of the range and she's all smiles! We decide to celebrate with popcorn and watching "Super Nanny" in my bed :D She dozes off and I do her 11pm test without her even flinching...194...wow! This is good...this is real good! Set the alarm for 2am....By then I knew she should be coming down...167...yes!

Saturday morning I tiptoe in and test her at 6am...143! Wow! This is great! Today is the Fall Festival at school. We met my Mom for breakfast at 7am...149! By 9am she was back to a 286 but she insisted that she felt well enough to go to the festival....still coughing! So we got there around 10am and she had 100 tickets to use up :) She had a good time playing all the games and the exciting part was...she did the cake walk and she won....she went over to the table and said "Mom, can I get the cake with no icing?" ... part of me wanted to cry (again) but the other part of me was so proud of her for choosing that way! Her principal was there and she actually praised her and gave her a thumbs up for getting the pound cake. Some of the games she played gave candy prizes and she'd play and put the candy in her bag and then she handed the bag to her sister and said "I got to play the game so heres a prize for you!" and she gave all the candy to her sister! While we were at one of the games, one of her friends came up and hugged her and then said "Kacey this game doesnt give the toy prizes!" (She's in Kaceys class so she knows) and Kacey turned around and said "It's ok! I don't want the candy! Im playing for my sister!" It made my heart smile :) As lunchtime got closer I figured she'd start fussing about being hungry...she didnt! I kept asking her if she wanted something and she just wasnt hungry...so I dont know what that is all about...but I made her test at 12pm to make sure she was ok.... 244! Ok...so the excitement is still kicked in...LOL! We got home at 1pm and she was still at 224 but I made her eat a little something. By dinner she was a 238 and then 8pm she tested for bedtime....133! YES! She was back in range before bed :) I'm thinking that maybe those lunch carbs need to be changed now!

Today has been a lazy Sunday. We've stayed around the house and she played most of the day. She woke up at a 212 though :( By 9am she was a 192 and ready to eat breakfast. Not sure whats going on with her appetite. Shes not been very hungry the last few days. Maybe the antibiotic has her out of whack? By lunch she was a 137 ... good number for her! But by dinner....306!!! Geesh!!! Don't know what in the world spiked her up like that?

This week will still be a little crazy. A bit of bad news.... Mrs. H's (Kaceys nurse) mom passed away on Friday :( We knew it was coming and our thoughts and prayers are with her as she makes all the arrangements and travels back home from Boston. I don't know when she will be back but the school does have an RN coming in by the end of the week. The sub thats been in the nurses office, Mrs. W, has been so good to Kacey since Mrs. H was gone. Even though Ive been up at school til she gets her shot, shes made sure to call me whenever Kacey wasnt feeling good and every time she tested so I knew what her numbers were. We're thankful that she's been in good hands :) I cracked up laughing the other day because Mrs. W (who Ive known for about 15 years now) told Kacey "Come over here and gimme some sugar (hugs & kisses)" and Kacey blurts out "Mrs. W, you have to stop giving me sugar because you're making my blood sugar stay high!" Hahahaha! It was priceless!

Thats about all for now :) I hope everyone had a nice weekend!

~*~JILL~*~

World Diabetes Day

Today is our first World Diabetes Day. It's not a holiday I really want to celebrate but its a day that I ask myself...What can I do to educate those around me? My first step is trying to encourage as many parents as I can to have their blood sugar checked and to have their child's checked at their well-checkup. This test is a simple finger stick that could be the difference in life & death. This simple test is something that Kacey does 8-12 times a day and all I'm asking is for them to do it once. I really think that a finger stick should be mandatory at every well check up...most of the finger sticks they do at check ups just check iron levels....not blood sugar! My next step is to encourage everyone I talk to today to go to www.jdrf.org and donate! They can still donate under Kacey's team name "Diabetes Sweeties". I will explain to them what JDRF does and how the money they give is helping researchers get one step closer to a cure!

My hope... a cure in Kacey's lifetime!

Wear blue in support of World Diabetes Day....wear blue in support of Kacey!

Update on Kacey:
I've been doing finger sticks every 3 hours since we were told to yesterday. She woke up at a 163 this morning :) I'll take it! We had to do 2 correction doses in between the regular doses and shes finally come down. Im going to leave the Lantus at 11 units and see how she does since she woke up in range this morning. She is feeling well enough to go back to school and shes excited about going to the play today. I'll be with her at school all day today and then we have the weekend to get things back on track. Hopefully her school nurse will be back on Monday. I havent heard anything so I hope shes doing ok. We've missed her the last 2 weeks!

More later...
~*~JILL~*~

Doc Visit Update

We found the culprit for the rise in blood sugars.....a sinus infection! Yep and we walked out with a prescription for Zithromax and a cough pill called Tessalon... hmmm cough pill? Apparently this pill wont rise her blood sugars like cough syrup will. LOL ... reminds me of some sort of gimmick thingy. Anyway...she just got her first dose and shes eating dinner and wanting to lay back down. When I checked her at 3pm she was a 309 so she did the correction shot without too much fuss. I explained to her that her Endo wanted her to check her sugar every 3 hours and if she was high then do a correction shot and as much as she was going to hate getting the shot, with any luck she'd actually feel better once she got her sugar back in range :) She agreed that she'd rather feel better than worry about a shot. Im just so proud of her! The blood sugar checks every 3 hours are gonna be a bitch tho...this means shes gotta do that at school too *grumbles*

Now I wanna rant about this visit with the doc....lol Im just all about ranting today but this is really bothering me. I dont have a medical degree...I dont claim to know everything about diabetes....and often Ive been known to ask more questions than I really should...but its only because I DO wanna know all I can about my daughters illness and be the best parent I could possibly be. That being said.... The doc is our family PCP. When I talked to the CDE earlier she suggested since Kacey hadnt been feeling well and was coughing til she threw up then she thought maybe we should see the PCP for a prescription to help her feel better. I took her advice and made the appt as soon as I could. This is the same PCP that I took her to when I thought she had the bladder infection and he sent us straight to the ER at Children's because she had Type 1! OK...so here is the convo:

Doc: So how much insulin does she get a day?
Me: Well it depends on her blood sugar. She gets 1:18 for bfast and lunch and 1:20 for dinner and then we do a correction dose for anything over 150.
Doc: Ok so how many units does she get?
Me: I dont know...it depends on whether she needs a correction dose and how many carbs she eats?
Doc: Well how many carbs does she eat?
Me: Ummm it depends on how hungry she is
Doc: Well how many calories is she eating?
Me: We were told not to watch calories...we watch carbs and dose her like that
Doc: I think your problem is food intake. Thats why she is having high blood sugars and once you get that under control then her numbers will come down.
Me: Thats not the problem for the highs...shes sick and shes still in her honeymoon and they are tweaking her dose.
Doc: Well she has more highs than normal blood sugars so its her food intake and she should be getting a set amount of insulin a day and she should be getting about 1400 calories a day or she should at least have a set number of carbs she is allowed to have.

Ok...by this point I could feel my cheeks getting red...I could see my oldest daughter shaking her head because she knew EXACTLY what I was thinking!! Clearly this doc was talking about TYPE 2!!!!! Not only that....he was telling me about the woman that came in and was taking 60 units a day and he just up'ed her dose to 70 units. Geezussssss 70 units of Humalog a day would kill Kacey!!! I was at a point that I couldnt even argue back because of the knot in my throat that was making me want to cry!!! I think I need to make an appt with the CDE just to discuss things going on and get us all on the same page. When Kacey is sick, I will just suck up the $40 copay and take her over there rather than taking her to a Family doc. Even tho Im not a huge fan of her Endo, they know all about her and have her blood sugar records and can make a better call as to what to do for her. This just sucks! I felt like I could have done more for her if I had the prescription pad! LOL!

~sigh~ So there ya have it....the frustrations of being a Mommy of a child with diabetes!

Who knows what tomorrow holds?!?!

We have the fieldtrip but it will all depend on whether she grumbles or smiles when I poke her in the morning. I'll update as I can!

~*~JILL~*~

ANOTHER Dose Change!

~sits up and tries to smile thru gritting teeth~

Yep...ANOTHER dose change! The CDE called and said the doc wanted to change her breakfast carbs from 1:20 to 1:18... hmmm isnt that what I wanted to do already? LOL! She said it seems Kacey's running high after breakfast.....DUH! Haha! Geesh...if I dont laugh about it then I'll cry!

We had another drop this afternoon...not as bad...but a BIG drop. She was a 287 at 3pm and she just tested for dinner and was a 79! Instead of treating a low, I just had her eat dinner. This way I'm not stuck in the situation I was the other day with overcorrecting. She said she feels fine so thats always a good thing :)

As for me, I picked up my application this afternoon and I dropped off 2 of the 3 letters of reference that I needed filled out. I was at Kacey's school all day again today :) It really has lit my teaching fire again and I really like being there. It also makes me feel better knowing that Im just an announcement away from getting to her. I will be up at school every day the rest of the week because her school nurse, Mrs. H, is still out of town. Her Mom is still really bad off *sad* I'm still keeping her in my thoughts and prayers.

~*~JILL~*~

Happy Blog Day!

Today is a GOOD day!

Today Kacey woke up at a 135 and she smiled when I kissed her cheek to wake her up. Yes. Today has been a good day! She's been in the best mood, despite creeping into the 200's at lunch. She's danced. She's played Barbies. She's gone outside with her sister. She's laughed. She's the Kacey I wish we could have every day!

Happy Blog Day to all my fellow bloggers out there!

I only started blogging just a few short months ago, yet some days I feel like I've been here longer. After we came home from the hospital with Kacey, I was internalizing all my feelings. I was scared to let anyone see me cry and I tried to remain so strong...it was the Mommy part of me! I thought if I let anyone see me cry then they'd see weakness and I didn't want to be seen as the Mommy that couldn't handle such a terrible diagnosis. So I turned to the internet as an outlet. I dove into reading everything I could get my fingers on...I clicked...clicked...clicked...and I started to run across blogs. Linking from one blog to another, I found a world that exsisted on here that I never knew about. A world filled with other people struggling with the daily in's and out's of diabetes and their stories gave me hope. I'll admit...there are many nights I sat here reading blogs (all the way back from the person's very first post) and by the time I got to the present day, I felt like I actually knew that person! I'd never chatted with them...never met them face to face...but we had a common link....diabetes. I didn't feel so alone anymore! I started blogging...started posting...and started to become "friends" with some people that I'd never even spoken to! How fascinating! These people that I'd become friends with had read my story like I did theirs...they knew some of my inner most feelings...they felt my struggle, my frustration, AND most of all my pain!

Sheri...if it wasn't for the blog and myspace...our girls never would have linked. You've given me hope...motivation...and the courage to be a parent of a type 1 child with diabetes. You're "been there, done that" helped me when I needed it most and I'm forever greatful for you and I'm proud to call you my friend! We love you and Nikki!! BTW, remind me to tell you about the "package".

Cara...being type 1 yourself you've been able to share info with me and let me know that what seems to be "not normal" ...really is "normal in diabetes life" and its ok to feel the way I do sometimes! Im thankful for the info you've shared with me and the hope you've given me as well! *HUGE HUGZ*

To all my other fellow bloggers that I don't know on a more personal level since I'm so new to this...I hope to get to know all of you better...and I'm thankful to all of you that have taken the time to post to me and let me know that things WILL get better...I just have to give it time! Every single post was taken to heart and you have NO idea what they all mean to me! Thank you SOOOO much!

To our friends and family that read the blog...thank you for your support over the last 4 months! We couldnt have made it without the love you've all given us. Your kind words...your support....your hope...and most of all your prayers! If you are reading the blog and keeping up on our daily struggles...dont be a stranger :) Leave me a post and let me know you're here! I'd love to know who's out there following along with us. :) Thanks!

As I close....I close with a smile and tears. A smile because this IS a good day...we're thankful and pray for more days like this. And tears because I really am so very happy to be a part of the Diabetes OC and to walk hand in hand with each and every one of you as we continue the day to day struggles and walk this long road together.

May you all have a blessed day!

~*~JILL~*~

One Helluva Ride!!

I guess I should have known better than to say anything about things being "better" *cry* After I posted the post before this, I got a phone call from the substitute nurse... "Hi Jill! (hearing desperation in her voice) I think you should come and get Kacey right now! She's throwing up and she doesnt feel good." .... I'M ON MY WAY!!!! So I get there and rush into the clinic...just in time to see Kacey with her head hung in the trash can puking and the Principal sitting with her. Imagine the rush that went thru my body when Kacey looked up at me with NO color in her face!! I tried talking to her and she had this "disoriented" state about her. I immediately cradled her in my arms and her Principal said she was worried because she'd went so pale. So I asked Kacey what made her sick? Was it the coughing? Was it the fact that she went from lunch to recess and was running around and got hot and sweaty? Was it the flu? I don't know....I got her to the car with a plastic bag, towels and a wet cloth in tow....and YES she used them on the way home!!! ~sigh~ Once we got home she got right in bed...her blood sugar was a 187....hmmm ok. She ended up going to sleep and I woke her up at 5pm since it was time to eat dinner...she tested.... 60!!!!!!! Holy LOW NUMBERS Batman! OMG! So now its time to eat....but instead she has 4 glucose tabs....wait 15min and test... Ummmm 495!!!!!! YIKES!!!!!!! Now what? Shes hungry and wanting dinner....shes at a 495 and I dont want to overcorrect....what do I do? Think Jill, THINK! OK...let her eat...give her the insulin for the food but only give her 2 units to correct and then retest in an hour and see where her number is. So thats what I do... an hour later... 181!!! Alright...so do I jump for joy since I didnt overcorrect and drop her again and because shes not thrown up since earlier and she feels fine.... or do I collapse from the emotional toll that this took on me? Neither! I take 4 Motrin to kill the migraine I have and smile. Talk about a roller coaster ride...geesh...my stomach is still in knots from dealing with everything!

It's now time to test for bedtime.... 146 :) ~sighs heavy~ I think I need a hot bubble bath...LOL!

~*~JILL~*~

How Low Can You Go?

It seems like everytime I have a rant at Diabetes, he decides to back off because he knows how damn frustrating it is! Last night Kaceys bedtime blood sugar was a 149!!! The lowest shes been in a while! Even though it was a good number, I decided to put on my Secret Spy costume and see if I could catch that criminal named Mr. D.P. (Dawn Phenomenon). After Cara's mention of it, I did some research and it was saying to test at 3am for a few days and see what the numbers are. I think this will also help the Endo make changes to the Lantus as well...geesh...wouldn't it have been just as easy for the CDE to say "Mom, try doing 3am checks for us so we can use those numbers to help us with her dose" ~sigh~ Anyway...her bedtime check was 149 @ 8pm ... I checked again at 11:30pm and she was a 214 .... then at 3am she was a 170 ... and woke up at 7am with a 142! So shes spiking up toward the midnight hour and then coming down? She was a 182 for lunch and still smiling. Im glad to see her feeling better tho! I will continue to do the 3am checks until I fax numbers on Monday and then see what the doc says then. Hopefully that will give them a better idea of how to change things. Wooohooooo!

As for me... with the school nurse being out, I've been up at the school volunteering because its easier than running back and forth. That "teacher" part of me is starting to come alive again! I taught preschool for 8 years and then when I had Kacey I quit to be home with her. A part of me always wanted to be back in the classroom but then I liked having the freedom of being at home. I've been in the classroom with 1st graders and after a few days they're hugging me and waving to me in the hall...I'm not just "Kacey's Mom" anymore... I'm "Mrs. West" :) So...I've made the decision to go back to work. Yeah I know... it was a long and hard decision...but I'm going to put in to substitute for now. That way I still have the flexability...but I will also be at the school with Kacey if she needs me. I figure if I'm going to be in the class I might as well get paid for being there! I'm really excited about going back. I redid my resume...in the process of getting my 3 letters of recommendation and a copy of my transcripts...and I'll drop by on Monday for the application. For now, I'll continue to volunteer :) I'm working in the office on Monday and helping the principal with some preparations for the Fall Festival. So lots of excitement here and I've really been happy the last few days... its been a long time since I've felt like this!

~*~JILL~*~

Dose Change...again!

I got a call back (finally) from Kacey's Endo...or should I say CDE. I hate when I can't talk to the doc or CNP. Anyway, they reviewed the faxed numbers I sent and they are going to increase her Lantus from 10 to 11 and then change the dinner carbs 1:18 and leave breakfast and lunch carbs 1:20. Why dont they just change all the meals. OK... Im really frustrated because yesterday school called me at 3:15pm and said Kacey was a 360 and feeling bad and wanted to go home. I got there and Kacey had the "I feel miserable" look on her face and so when we got home she went right to her bed and ended up sleeping for nearly 2 hours. When she woke up it was dinner time and she tested... 153!!

Numbers yesterday were...

262 @ 7am

271 @ 8am

283@ 1pm

360 @ 3pm

153 @ 5pm

237@ 6pm

145 @ 8pm

then 210@ 7am this morning

Now...why am I frustrated? Cuz the dinner dose isnt the only one that needs to be changed! Shes high in the morning when she wakes up...for the last week she wakes up over 200 every morning and then shes high at all 3 meals! I keep screaming at myself because I want to change the dose myself but I know the doc has his reasons for doing what he's doing. I just hate her staying high all the time because it makes her feel so damn bad! She missed 2 days of school last week because she was in the high 300's and just wanted to stay in bed with a case of the "grumpies". So do I change the other meals 1:18 and see what happens and then tell the doc what I did.... or do I leave her like this and wait for the doc to do it? GRRRRRRR!

Oh yeah...and did I mention I always hated Math and now I see numbers in my freakin dreams!!

~*~Frustrated Mommy~*~

Mrs. H .... and some prayers needed!

Kacey & Mrs.H at the JDRF Walk to a Cure

She came out to support Kacey and walk with her!

Today got me thinking about how we take some things for granted.

When Kacey first went back to school in September, I was an overprotective mother that felt like she was leaving her newborn with a stranger. The first few weeks were rough...ok they were more than just rough! I nearly worried myself sick. I had the "No one can care for my child better than I can" attitude and I wasn't ready to let someone else take care of Kacey just 6 weeks after being diagnosed. So yes...I was picky...I was harsh....and over the last 2 months so many things have changed. After settling into a school routine, all of us were comfortable with the way things were going. I'd drive Kacey to school...she'd go test before lunch...go back for her shot but she'd call me to make sure her dose was right....and then she'd get her shot and go to class. It's been this routine for the last month now and things have been so smooth. I'm thankful that Mrs. H finally got the hang of figuring up Kaceys dose and shes now able to care for her the way I would....yep I said it... I know she loves Kacey dearly and she tells her all the time "I wish I had a granddaughter....can you be my adopted granddaughter?" and that makes me feel so good! I know shes cared for to the best of her ability and she'd never let anything intentionally happen to Kacey. So...all that being said...over the last 4 weeks Ive gotten very comfortable in that routine and I got a call from Mrs. H while we were home on our 5 day break. Her mother has taken a turn for the worse and she was going out of town. She called to let me know she was trying to get a sub nurse but no one was calling back and she didnt want me to walk into school and be hit with this. We get into school this morning...no RN at school. They couldnt get a sub nurse so one of the teachers is filling in for her. I've known the teacher since I was in high school so I quickly gave her a run-down of Kaceys level of care and since Kacey was running high (yep, shes still in the 200's!) I wasnt feeling upset at all. I told her I would be back up there at lunch so she didnt have to figure out Kaceys dose and Id make sure she got her shot. She was relieved!! So I went back up there for lunch....Kacey was at a 283...yep still high...and so I had lunch with her and came back home. While I was driving home, I realized how greatful I am to have Mrs. H. Yeah, it may have taken her a little longer to learn Kaceys care...but I miss her being there to take care of Kacey.

So Im asking everyone to please send up some prayers for her. She had to hop a plane yesterday and she will be gone the rest of the week. I know she is going to worry about things back here and I pray she doesnt. I want her to focus on the time she has left with her Mom and not worry about anything back here. I pray for her safe return and I pray that she's given the strength to deal with whatever comes.

Thanks!

~*~JILL~*~

Welcome our New President

CHANGE? Yes. Change for this country :) It was time for a change!

I Voted!

DID YOU VOTE?

It's your right....DO IT!

Trick or Treat!

Kacey (Tigger) & Kayleigh (Dorothy)

Stephen (Scarecrow), Kayleigh (Dorothy),

Me (Wicked Witch) & Frankie (Evil Hunter)

We managed to survive Halloween...with a starting blood sugar of 372 @ 5:30pm(can you say EXCITED?) and it dropping to a 97 @ 8pm!! Kacey did really good at the party...until we got back from trick or treating. She started feeling the drop and started feeling bad *sad* so we ended up leaving so she could get her Lantus and something to eat. We got in the car and we didnt even get 5 miles up the road before she fell asleep...poor thing!

So last night she actually had a Reeses cup with her dinner. You'd of thought I gave her a million dollars! She was so happy :) We made sure we added in the 12 carbs with her meal dose and she was happy as a clam! Her numbers are closer to range today so maybe the highs were just the excitement of Halloween coming...who knows?

~*~JILL~*~

First MeMe

This is my first Meme :) (stolen from Cara...lol)


1. Where is your cell phone? In my hoodie front pocket
2. Your significant other? Asleep In bed
3. Your Hair? Dark Brown
4. Your Skin? Tan
5. Your mother? Caring
6. Your favorite thing? My kids
7. Your dream last night? Didnt dream
8. Your favorite drink? Sweet tea
9. Your dream/goal? To live a long and happy life
10. The room you’re in? Living room
11. Your ex? 13 years ago
12. Your fear? Sound of a chainsaw and crickets
13.Where do you want to be in 6 years? Happy
14.Where were you last night? Celebrating Halloween at a party
15.What you’re not? Ungrateful!
16.Muffins? Mmmmm...banana but!
17.One of your wish list items? Trip to Hawaii
18.Where you grew up? Virginia
19.The last thing you did? Watched movies with the kids
20.What are you wearing? Jeans and a hoodie...its coldddddddd!
21.Your TV? Off
22.Your pets? Cat & Dog
23. Your computer? Damn dialup!
24. Your life? BUSY!
25. Your mood? Tired
26. Missing someone? Sure
27. Your car? White
28. Something you’re not wearing? Watch
29. Favorite Store? Walmart
30. Your summer? Scary...Busy...Kaceys diagnosis....Kayleighs hockey
31. Like someone? Sure
32. Your favorite color? Purple
33. When is the last time you laughed? Dinner
34. Last time you cried? today when watching P.S. I Love You
35. Who will respond to this? Anyone
36. Who’s answers are you anxious to see? Everyone's