That cartoon made me giggle! Sometimes I feel like it's a struggle to put my words together and then when I finally do, it all goes to crap!
I've had some time over the last few weeks to really think about WHY I write? WHY do I blog? WHY do I write out my daily life for the entire world wide web to see?
A few simple things came to mind.
When I first started blogging, not one single soul knew I existed. I was in a secret space online where I could write out my feelings and frustrations without anyone knowing or seeing. It was my own diary. I was only a few days into Kacey's diagnosis and I was having a hard time channeling all the feelings that I was bombarded with. I blogged about my daily life as a parent of a Type 1 diabetic. I blogged about the struggles, the victories and the challenges. It was HARD! As the months went by, I began to realize there were other parents out there like me. There were other parents feeling those same feelings I did. Although I could only see them through pictures and their words, we connected. I began to build friendships with other Moms. They read my words. They felt my heartache. They got it! Although I didn't have any real life followers, most family and friends didn't even know my blog existed, I was connecting. Diabetes Sweeties became very real.
As the months passed, I started to share my blog more and more. I also opened up more and more. It wasn't just Type 1 diabetes I talked about. It was struggles at school. It was work. It was something called LIFE! I blogged happy times. I blogged sad times. I posted pictures for the world to see. My blog finally took on a purpose. I was getting emails and comments telling me how encouraging my words were. I got comments about how nice it was to know they weren't alone because they were struggling with the same things. I actually felt like my writing took on purpose. I can only count a handful of times where I ever got any negative feedback and it was mostly from someone anonymous that was nit picking. I never had any negative feedback from any local people.
So imagine my shock when I got a call telling me I offended someone with my writing. I couldn't imagine what I had written that was so harsh that someone was offended and insulted. Had my words REALLY been that bad? Even today, I still blog with purpose. I blog our daily life because I know there are others out there that struggle through the same things but they are too afraid to share them.
OFFEND- of·fend/əˈfend/Verb- Cause to feel upset, annoyed, or resentful.
INSULT- in·sult/inˈsəlt/Verb- Speak to or treat with disrespect or scornful abuse
These two words were being thrown at me and all I could do was sit there with my mouth wide open. REALLY? So as I took a step back, reread what I had typed, I still felt like I shouldn't have had to remove any posts I wrote. WHY did I do it? To keep peace for my daughter's sake. I probably could have fought things out, made jerks out of everyone involved, then walked away feeling terrible. But I do have a conscious and I don't try to intentionally hurt peoples feelings. I DO blog the truth about our daily life so if the truth bothers you then you probably shouldn't be reading my blog anyway. That being said, the people that I offended and insulted, get off easy. Yes, I know the Lord knows that things were done wrong. The whole way it was handled was wrong. The people that were offended and insulted couldn't even come to me and tell me how they felt about what I had written. They had two higher school officials call me....TWICE...and ask for it to be removed. Why should the truth be removed? Is someone afraid of getting in trouble? Are they afraid the whole world will see what happened and they will be judged by their actions? Sad, huh? Then they had the nerve to look me in the face and actually smile and try and carry on a conversation like nothing ever happened. How can someone do that? It just sickens me! Do you not feel any guilt? Do you not think my feelings were hurt that you didn't come to me and deal with it? Do you really think that I'm not thinking about what you did while you're talking to me? You took the easy road and let someone else handle your problem. The most important thing I've learned in church lately is, if you have a problem with someone then you go to that person and address the problem, deal with it and try and resolve it. That's what I did! I guess there was just no resolving it with these people.
So what do I do? I continue to blog! :)